It's Mother's Day today and it feels so different without my son with me anymore. No more hugs and kisses and special meal deliveries. No more nagging and getting advice from the only best person in my world.
It's been two weeks since his passing. I want to imagine that I am in heaven with him, playing Roblox and Minecraft, making art stuff, reading, learning, joking, and building Legos the way we used to. But all these will only be in my dreams and forever in my memories.
Whenever I think of Dranix, I'd read this poem over and over again to comfort myself and see things unselfishly, to accept reality, and trust that he had returned safely back to the hands of the creator.
This poem was sent to me by one of his doctors and I want to share it with you.
I Will Lend You A Child
I will lend you, for a little time,
A child of mine, He said.
For you to love the while he lives,
And mourn for when he's dead.
It may be six or seven years,
Or twenty-two or three.
But will you, till I call him back,
Take care of him for Me?
He'll bring his charms to gladden you,
And should his stay be brief.
You'll have his lovely memories,
As solace for your grief.
I cannot promise he will stay,
Since all from earth return.
But there are lessons taught down there,
I want this child to learn.
I've looked the wide world over,
In search for teachers true.
And from the throngs that crowd life's lanes,
I have selected you.
Now will you give him all your love,
Nor think the labour vain.
Nor hate me when I come
To take him home again?
I fancied that I heard them say,
Dear Lord, Thy will be done!
For all the joys Thy child shall bring,
The risk of grief we'll run.
We'll shelter him with tenderness,
We'll love him while we may,
And for the happiness we've known,
Forever grateful stay.
But should the angels call for him,
Much sooner than we've planned.
We'll brave the bitter grief that comes,
And try to understand.
I also want to share this with you. It was sent to me by a dear friend early this morning on a beautiful Mother's Day.
"A baby asked God, They tell me you are sending me to earth tomorrow, but how am I going to live there being so small and helpless?
Your angel will be waiting for you and will take care of you.
The child further inquired, But tell me, here in heaven I don't have to do anything but
sing and smile to be happy.
God said, Your angel will sing for you and will also smile for you. And you will feel your
angel's love and be very happy.
Again the child asked, And how am I going to be able to understand when people talk
to me if I don't know the language.
God said, Your angel will tell you the most beautiful and sweet words you will ever
hear, and with much patience and care, your angel will teach you how to speak.
And what am I going to do when I want to talk to you?
God said, Your angel will place your hands together and will teach you how to pray.
Who will protect me?
God said, Your angel will defend you even if it means risking it's life.
But I will always be sad because I will not see you anymore.
God said, Your angel will always talk to you about Me and will teach you the way to
come back to Me, even though I will always be next to you.
At that moment there was much peace in Heaven, but voices from Earth could be
heard and the child hurriedly asked, God, if I am to leave now, please tell me my
angel's name.
You will simply call her, Mom."